Every time I get to see an old punk rock or hardcore band it makes me feel pretty warm and fuzzy inside, combining both nostalgia and the unique experience of a reunion tour. On the other side of things just hearing a song or album from ages ago sparks concrete memories because, I think, it is an invisible and aural experience while seeing a performance is, as said, unique for its time and place. So we’re more free to daydream, recollect, and fantasizing when listening to an old record. Hearing a Bigwig album last night for the first time in 10 years, I wanted to ask whether this music was/is any good or whether it just brings back fond memories, but those are two unrelated questions and the latter is much more interesting.
I had forgotten so much of high school until that Bigwig album; at the sound of the first note images of Collingwood Collegiate Institute came to mind. Exactly where I had my lockers, my classrooms, the alcoves and hallways where I saw a few bloody fights. More importantly, one of the first things I said when the cd started playing was not how great the band was, but that it reminded me of some of the girls I had crushes on. It reminded me that my teenage years were filled with anxiety and excitement at the slightest possibility of communicating with my crush, or holding hands, or maybe, just maybe if all the planets aligned at lunchtime, getting a little kiss.
Thinking more about it now, nothing has really changed. I’m still anxious and excited by the tiniest glance from a stranger, staying up much too late thinking about how a date might go, or worrying whether or not the sex was any good (please don’t tell me if you’re reading this and we’ve done it – unless I was excellent). In a couple years I turn thirty; it will be fun to see what songs bring back memories of my twenties and then feel all the accompanying emotions and sensations.